For those of you who have read my last post and gathered from it the pain I am working through, I want to first express my gratitude for the support, both vocal and quiet, you have honored me with. I also want you to know that even in the course of this obscenely awful period, I can maintain some level of humor. To that end, I offer more from the online dating world.
For those of you who have read my last post and gathered from it the pain I am working through, I want to first express my gratitude for the support, both vocal and quiet, you have honored me with. I also want you to know that even in the course of this obscenely awful period, I can maintain some level of humor. To that end, I offer more from the online dating world.
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Initiation is hilarious! I know, I know, I have a pile of posts were I speak about how hard it is and the trials you go through and the misery that comes with it and how it is all worth the pain in the end. So, you’re thinking, no freaking way am I doing something that sounds about as much fun as participating in a real life Saw event. Yes, please, I’d like to chew off my own arm! I can’t say that the work I have done hasn’t been difficult and that there have been times where I wasn’t sure I’d make it through or even times I wanted to chew through a bottle of prescription medicine. However, there is a lighter side to all of this. Magic, initiation, the trials you put yourself through can be pretty damn funny. Those magicians out there who take their practice without humor, be warned; I am totally going to make fun of it. Wait, no, I don’t me your practice in particular, just the practice of initiation. Humor is an integral part of my practice and for all the shit I put myself through, I need to be able to look back and laugh. So, I have begun the terrifying process of wandering into the next ring of Hell (Dante’s version). I am not terribly fond of putting my feet on the frozen glass littering the ring, but, my options are stay where I am or move forward. What’s a girl like me going to do but move forward? Stagnation is not an option. Besides, maybe there will be a cute outfit on the other side! The other side of what, you ask? Why, what a lovely question. This ring of Hell I am talking about is the dating ring. Listen to the screaming of all the souls who are being tortured with horrifically written profiles, bots, people taking advantage of desperation, people trying to get to the USA, and other forms of torment! Yes, it’s true. I have finally reached the point where I am willing to stick my skinny ass out there and see if there is anyone that can lift the baggage in my suitcase. I’m pretty sure that I could be an event in the strongman competition. So, on Monday I had an appointment with my endocrinologist. She is a wonderful woman and we chat like girlfriends when I am there. Sometimes we even discuss the medical issues at hand when we stop gabbing long enough for one of us to bring up the topic. So, we get to talking about my reactions and health with regard to my current dosage of what I fondly refer to as my ‘girl pills’. This causes me to blurt out, “So, when do I get breasts?” Ha! I bet you didn’t see that line coming. So, here I am, a human in transition with all sorts of fun medical and administrative issues that will take me the next few years, at least, to work through. Well, fate being particularly obnoxious and who has a bad sense of humor as well as timing, decides to hit me with breathing issues. For some reason, without exerting myself much at all, I am occasionally unable to catch my breath. It seems like no oxygen is getting into my system at all. My heart does not race and it doesn’t feel like my airways are constricted, I simply cannot get air. So, I sit there, since I can’t stand, gulping air and looking very put out and ridiculous.
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Lasciel AnnwynnI am one of those. Yes, that kind. I poke around in the corners and lesser explored paths of life looking for it's mysteries. There is so much magic in the world when you open your perception to it. Look with eyes of wonder. Archives
April 2019
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